past [Theme]

When you look back, some excesses are tempting to be edited, like an unsuccessful sentence in a text, or deleted altogether. It seems that if you deny their presence, it will be easier to move on. But this not only creates knots in the soul, but also stops. It is possible to physically move between events and countries, notice how the reflection in the mirror ages, and the number of candles on the birthday cake increases over the years - but still be at the age and place when the mental trauma began. Personal collapse is akin to death. And without all the stages of grief, it is impossible to cope with this episode and overcome it. Both the death of a loved one and the murder of some part of oneself - as a rule, this is an innocent element of the essence - is accepted along with tears and anger. You can’t just keep something good and throw away the bad - it’s all intertwined. One thing leads to another. Or you cut off your past completely and pretend that it didn’t exist at all, and thereby cut off a piece of your life. Or you accept everything. At the same time, it is worth remembering: by avoiding pain, you are running away from the future.