TV show: Mike Birbiglia: Thank God for jokes (Mike Birbiglia: Thank God for Jokes)

That always late people don't understand about us, punctual people - is the fact that we hate you. And we hate you, because in time to come it is so easy. You just need to come early, but then early hours.

Jokes at their best make us feel closer to each other. Most married I love the fact that you can share with your wife or husband jokes, funny only to the two of you and no one else, except for your cat. Because when you have a cat, your barometer of humor just breaks.

Late people are constantly trying to put delay in the best light. They say: "too Late - my way". It is like saying: "to Be a racist my style".

I'm afraid of cops. I always thought that more than anything I'm afraid of bears, but you get killed by a bear, at least everyone will be mad at the bear. If you kill a COP, then 30% of Americans will say, "It's hard work".