Susan Forward. Men who hate women and the women who love these men (№ 275787)

Often when I ask students to give characteristics to the partner, I get the response "he is a laborer" "he takes good care of the family," "he's funny" "he spends a lot of time with children", "he's charming, he's beautiful." There is no dispute that these features attract. However they are the Foundation of a good relationship.
Good relationships are based on mutual respect and a relatively equal balance of power. These include caring about each other and considerate to the needs and feelings of partners and understanding the things that make partners special. It is clear that within this ideal there is a place for arguments, bad moods, differences of opinion, sometimes even anger. However, loving partners find active ways to cope with these differences they see in each collision the battle, in which you can win or fail.
In other words - a good relationship should enrich and expand your life, not narrow it down, forcing you to abandon what is part of you and your character. We come into this relationship because we are attracted to qualities that we see in our partners. However, if we require that we have abandoned the best in us, to keep peace in the house, then it is wrong.