Susan Forward. Men who hate women and the women who love these men (№ 275824)

Your honest answer will confirm to the children that they at some level knew. When you tell them that their feelings are true, you will free them from self-incrimination, which they could build for themselves due to problems in the family. Shifting the responsibility for someone whose bad behavior is to blame, - for adults, you save children from future models of self-loathing.