Sergei Dovlatov. Reserve (№ 306326)

You don't get paid - that's what bad. Money is freedom, space, moods... Having money, so easy to endure poverty...
Learn to earn them, not hypocrisy. Go to work as a loader, write nights. Mandelstam said, people will save whatever they need. So write...
You have the aptitude for it could not be. Write, create a masterpiece. Call emotional shock to the reader. At a single living person... the Task of a lifetime.
If that doesn't work? Well, you said yourself, morally failed attempt more noble. Not least because that is not rewarded...
Write, once took, get this off my chest. Than it weight, the easier...