Book: The black monk

Kovrin now clearly saw that he was a mediocrity, and readily accepted it because, in his opinion, everyone should be happy with what he has.

I thought you were an extraordinary man, a genius, I loved you, but you were crazy...

It was gentle and soft combination of blue and green; in places the water was like the color of blue vitriol, and in places, it seemed that the moonlight had thickened and instead of water filled the Bay, and in General, what harmony of colors, peaceful, serene, and joy!

- As the happy Buddha and Mohammed or Shakespeare that their good family and doctors did not treat them with ecstasy and inspiration! said Kovrin. - If Mohammed took from the nerves, potassium bromide, worked only two hours a day and drink milk after this wonderful man would have remained as little, as after his dog. The doctor and the good family in the end will do what humanity is getting stupid. mediocrity will be considered genius and civilization will perish. If you knew, said Kovrin with shame, - how grateful I am!

Preparations of bromide, idleness, warm baths, supervision, cowardly rhinestone for each breath, for every step - all this in the end will drive me to idiocy. I was mad, I had megalomania, but I was happy, cheerful and even happy, I was interesting and original. Now I have become sensible and solid but I'm like everyone else: I'm a mediocrity, I was bored.. Oh, how cruelly you have treated me! I saw hallucinations, but who was it bothering? I ask: who was it bothering?

Only now looking at her [Tania], Kovrin realised the danger of his position, he learned the meaning of the black monk and talking with him. For him now it was clear that he was crazy.

Joy is a supernatural feeling? Shouldn't she be a normal human condition? The higher man's mental and moral development than he is freer, the more pleasure life gives him. Socrates, Diogenes, and Marcus Aurelius felt joy, not sadness. And the Apostle says: always rejoice. Well rejoice and be happy.

Known not smiling at you. Is that flattering, or amusing, or instructive that your name will be engraved on a tombstone, then time will erase this inscription together with the gilding? And, fortunately, you too much to the weak human memory could retain your names.

"Hello," said the monk after a pause, asked: - what do you think?
- On glory, answered Kovrin. In the French novel I have just read, shows a man, a young scientist who does silly things, and languishes from longing for glory. I have this strange longing.
Because you're smart. You to fame are indifferent to the toy, which you did not take.

- Strange that you repeat what often comes me to mind, said Kovrin. You're, like, spied and overheard my secret thoughts.

Not everything is true that was said by the Romans or the Greeks. Elevated mood, excitement, ecstasy - all that distinguishes prophets, poets, martyrs for the idea of ordinary people, disgusting animal side of man, that is his physical health. I repeat: if you want to be healthy and normal, go to the herd.

The Romans said: mens sana in corpore sano.

Why do you know brilliant people who believe the whole light, too, saw ghosts? Now scientists say that genius is akin to insanity. My friend, healthy and normal only mediocre, gregarious people. Considerations about the nervous century, fatigue, degeneration, etc. can seriously disturb only those who the purpose of life sees in the present, that is to herd people.

If I know I'm mentally ill, then can I trust myself?