bash [Theme]

Literally an hour ago. Friend needs to pass before the end of may. Calls to the city traffic police:
- Hi, it seems THAT got canceled, what do I do?
Hey, yesterday you watched the news?
- Watched.
- Were you surprised?
- Surprised.
- And we're all ***you. Please call back later.

xxx: and you know what, my boyfriend does not care about the appearance, he loves me for my brains!
yyy: what is he, a zombie?..

ness: In the clinic went in the toilet the announcement: "on the toilet did not go up and the ad no need to use"
komiksa: you see, not the first

xxx: those who finger confidently groped a USB input on the rear panel of a computer - problems with girls will not.

xxx: it Is necessary to create on the server of the uni folder "Porn", to close her NTFS permissions to all but the admin of the server, and you learn how shitty the protected server and how many at the University of gifted students :)
yyy: so there's no porn. Some sort of garbage lies. :D
xxx: And you there!

xxx: wanted sausage to take, reached into the fridge - no. Well then decided to make crackers with butter. Took oil, unfolded packaging, and there... sausage. Clever mother, clever.

xxx press any key
yyy: this is possible?
xxx: this no

xxx: the Holiday went for me!
xxx: In the train I was approached by a young man to get to know, not grandma to give ME a place...

There is a third hour classes. Everyone is tired. The teacher draws on the blackboard a diagram, a circle inside another circle. And asks a joyful voice: "Well? What's it like??" And then heard a quiet, sad voice from the audience: "On the eggs...."

ynestulya: went to a consulting firm, in their office lives a talking parrot, a big one. Parrot regularly utters the phrase "DotA", "beer" and "double keel". I don't doubt their professionalism?

xxx: damn, need to vacuum
xxx: I realized it when I felt a foot in something soft, thought the cat
xxx: it turned out a huge piece of dust (((

Anna: I received promotional SMS :D "for buying something you will get 1000 *some text missing**Ley! Waiting for you"

I went today to the Bank. There are two ATM. On one hangs a piece of paper that says "sorry, the ATM is out of paper", next to the second 10 people turn. I looked at it and went to the first ATM. Put the card, took the money and started to leave, and then I noticed like half the queue from the second ATM rushed to the first... what were they thinking before? There is no paper, then print money is not what?

- I've recently noticed that the computer noise a bit like a fan noise.
You won't believe...