Calling. On Choice, Duty, and Neurosurgery (№ 434151)

Part of me was looking forward to being fired: I would get rid of eternal anxiety and worries and I would be able to manage my own time myself. But another part of my mind believed that in retirement my life would be drastically empty and would be little different from death; that senile helplessness awaits me and, possibly, early dementia, on which my life, in fact, will end.