Character: Philip Balls

In connection with the upcoming increase in gasoline prices ordinary people will breathe easier, but motorists harder. As the saying goes: "Love to ride - love and money to pay!"

Hello, you've reached the President of the Russian Federation. Switch the unit on polite tone dialing and follow the instructions. If you want to learn about the progress in the economy - hit 1. If you want to hear about a breakthrough in international relations - press 2. If you are wondering why since the last press conference there has been no significant change - put the phone down and never baluetsya!

This year, the country with great enthusiasm responded to the traditional Christmas action of the President, "the Irony of fate, or With easy PR". Especially now that everyone already understands the rules of the game. On the appointed day at the appointed time all the voluntary participants must begin to call in live on TV and radio. First caller will receive the Grand prize - the President will help him to solve all his problems! The second and third will be awarded t-shirts with a portrait of the guarantor, and finally all the rest by as much as two hours to get his picture on the screen of your TV! Oh, what a joy!

- Yes with this image we anywhere! Even in the world's democratic society, at least in a United Europe!
- Here invented: "If you want to Europe - exhuming uncle Stepa".

I was fortunate to witness a unique experiment at the Institute of microsurgery of gas and a VASE. Scientists and surgeons have wondered what would make our automakers produce cars not worse maintained cars and realized that the hands they would have to find and paste is supported, foreign. The operation is which year, there is hope for success, only to be caught nerodime.

- In General, the state Duma made a smart repair. Lemons two hundred rubles. Built with a gym, billiard room, cut down a bathhouse, opened the Internet cafe, there is very often oak floors.
- Do some kind of entertainment center, it turns out!
<...>
- Billiards, you say? I would place the MP Sha...
Sha! Sha! Stop! Yeah don't you know that it is now impossible to say not only the names of the parties and these... fraction, but even family members!
- I'm sorry, and now the media with such a ban will work?
- Stepushka, very simply, Aesop will work!

Our great scientists have built a real time machine. And now they hope to win a Nobel prize, and most importantly - to move for a couple of years in the future and get the salary for September. Naive what.