Real vampires (What We Do in the Shadows) (№ 309672)

Once I went... was selling all sorts of goods... and passed by this old creepy castle. I looked at him and thought "how old and ugly!" Then suddenly some kind of creature came at me! And dragged into a dark dungeon! And bit into my neck. And when to death was only a moment, this creation made me drink his dirty blood... and then it spread its wings and hovered above me - "you're a vampire!"... It was Peter! We are still best friends.