Author of quotes: Paul Bettany

People need to go to a movie, or I know where they live.
This is a film about how terribly violent and if they don't watch it, I'll come and kill them.

I do swear a lot. Most likely, this is due to the scarcity of vocabulary. I think I'll never be truly chic. But you know what? To hell with that.

I was having a debate with my father Jennifer about baseball, the glove used by the players. I asked: "Why do you need gloves, you just like girls". And he said that the baseballs are heavier and tougher than cricket. But this is not true, because I, like an idiot, I went online and found out the weight of a baseball and cricket ball - and I don't even like these kinds of sports! and called him in the middle of the night and said, "It's heavier! Harder!", and hung up.

I hate insects: they live and they go about their business, and they scare me. There was one such: a large shiny blue creature that flies. It flew at me, so I screamed and ran away.

On "Master and commander":
"And you know, at the end of the movie where they write "No animals were harmed" should be written "Except for a parrot in a bar, Monkey Bar" because at five in the morning, I have to say, I was quite rude to him verbally, and I think he's got emotional trauma".

Under this playful boyish shell beats the heart of a ruthless sadistic maniac.

My name is Paul Bettany, and sometimes I write poetry. Recently I read them and realized that they like the ravings of overly emotional 14-year-old boy. What a shame, because it really is nonsense too emotional 31-year-old man.

About the futility of optimism:
"Damn the glass is half empty! Period!"

Due to the fact that I speak with a British accent, everyone thinks, "Gee, he must be very smart...". So you can start too much talking. When I go to a party and start talking, people listen to me. And for good reason.