Character: Cheech Falcone

- Cheech, can we talk? I'm worried about Pitti! I don't know what it is, and don't understand what's wrong with me that I suddenly began to worry for him.
I'm telling you every time you're worried about the guy. Get him drunk, put him a woman - and then he will understand the meaning of life.
- Not sure what good parents do, Cheech.
- Do you remember your first time?
- Of course! Her name was Sharon. And she had a divine body! She had to help change a tire.
Bus, and then she took off your pants, and you understand what the joy of life.
- How do you know?
Because she was a prostitute.
What?!
- Your father paid her. He told me. You were overweight teenager who loves Broadway musicals, and he had to fix it.