Nina Shervashidze. You know, after death... (№ 409630)

You know, after the death of loved ones, you change, unfortunately, for the worse. You stop seeing the world as it really is. No, the world does not plunge into black and white, the world is still the same. You know, the colors are still the same. You still get up in the morning, check your Instagram feed, like something, then, as usual, crawl to the coffee machine in order to drink a hot latte and read your work letters at the same time. Everything seems to be the same as always: blue sky, green grass, the same job, you come to the office wearing the same things as always, you laugh at the same jokes as always. You return to an already empty house, but everything seems to be there as always, even dust in the same places. Nothing changes. The only thing that happens is that there is nothing you can do. This is the worst torture - waiting when nothing can be done. Awaiting the forensic medical examiner's report. Waiting for the last piece of earth to fall on the coffin. All life comes down to waiting: waiting for the murderer to be caught, waiting for the court verdict seems to be one more moment and life will become easier. Everything will return, there will not be this endless heaviness in the chest, there will be no desire to drown out thoughts with alcohol, there will be no desire to put a drill to the temple at one moment to drown out everything that is going on in the head ...