TV show: Whitney Cummings: I'm your girl (Whitney Cummings: I'm Your Girlfriend)

Women have become stronger, and become more independent than they are, the guys are becoming more aggressive towards us.

I am a fun. What do you want? To spank me? Great! Come on! I'll try not to laugh, but come on!

I went with a guy on a date, and he asked me if I was experiencing jet orgasm. Our bodies don't do amazing things? We can give life, can we become pregnant, we can breast-feed babies. We can give you orgasms. Now you want us to putting out fires?

Now 21, I don't need an alpha male for protection! I need a guy with fast wi-fi, so I could Google "can I take Xanax pregnant." I don't need more strong guy to fight with a tiger! I need a geek who will delete my naked pictures from the "cloud"!

You need to take into account the fact that the male brain is, in fact, designed for one search openings. Roughly speaking, that's all they're doing at any point in time. Scan in search of crevices -- They like gophers: looking for what hole you want to go.

I started Dating a guy and, sooner or later, during sex he will say: "You're a bad girl?" I always say, "No. I pay my taxes on time".

You call us "babies" in a sexual context! The baby is the only valid symbol of the age that you can tell a woman in bed. It is impossible to say, "Yes, come on, baby, bend over! You like that, tiny?"

If a man pays for a woman, the expected effect is that she slept with him, right? But when I paid the man, the expected effect was that I'm NOT going to sleep with you! And we'll be all night talking about my dreams. Today, we are going horoscopes to read, bitch!

You know that post-coital morning-after pill is $ 49? I have never not had sex with a guy, so in the morning I'm like, "Yeah, 50 bucks for that - thing!"

When a guy is lying to you, obviously, because he will repeat your question in your response, to have time to think up lies.

The relationship should be as the hotel check-in. Here we'll begin to meet. Once started, you lay the credit card. If after three months you want to break up, I'll say, "Okay, let's see your account. You give me $ 3200 needs. Or don't go."

Men can have kids whenever. Clint Eastwood became a dad in your 70s! Robert De Niro seems to be in 68! This is so weird! The idea is to become a parent in 68 years. It's like, "I really want a baby, but for 10 years".

Birth control pills are insulting all: they make the box pink, the pellets also. All women love pink. And if the color pink affects your decision to accept them or not, it means that you 10 years and you take birth control before. If you want me to remember to take them, don't do pills pink. Make them in the form of little crying kids.