Erich Maria Remarque. The life of a loan (№ 412532)

He doesn't understand me. He does not know that by any means I would like to snatch from death those few days that in reality I am no longer destined to live. But I will never become a grumbling octogenitive old woman and I will not suffer the fate of an aging woman who no longer wants to see her lover and from whom he recoils in fright, having met her many years later. In the memory of my beloved, I will remain eternally young; I will be stronger than all the other women who will live longer and become older than me.