Book: Tomorrow I always been a lion

All I got well. Very good. Too good. Because the world looked different, and not what I was expecting to see him, and when everything was so good, I with renewed urgency felt bad, and how lonely I was until now.

People may look down upon you due to the fact that you are different, but it may happen that you from the fear of this attitude are beginning to see what is actually there.

Over the years I have learned to appreciate the ability to choose the right moment. No time applied the right method can give absolutely not the result we seek, and sometimes you need to wait to Mature the right time.

The ability to contain everything in itself is a special property that is not often found, but it is very important. <...>
People who are not bent before the storm, able to cope with anger, rage, resentment, grief, shame, guilt, jealousy, joy, fear, longing, and love. People who happily take winter storms and summer heat, and which can hold the soul twice in cold winter than sunshine and spring rain.

Change and self-knowledge is a process coming from within, and it cannot be artificially accelerated. <...>
Understanding of one's own inner life and health it is impossible to give the man just hand in hand, just as it is impossible to pull out of a seed of a blooming sunflower. But the sunflower seed will not grow in a paper bag. He needs space, good soil, light and nutrition, and it then from a small seed will turn into a luxurious flower.

To learn about my diagnosis in part is even useful. Finally all that was not called by name, you have confirmed that you are not lazy, not dirty girl and sick man. <...> Furthermore, the diagnosis sometimes gives you hope that someone will take care of you and your issues.

The man is unpredictable, there is always at least a small chance that everything will work out if we works hard and spend a lot of time.

Whatever did the man himself from this pain, too.

Usually I wasn't allowed to drink coffee all together because the coffee was served in ordinary cups, and I had a bad habit of beating these cups, then to cutting my arms.

I've never been anywhere except in the places talking which was no fun. Unlike me, she had it all, and she's told me some things and I listened, but we both understood turns one-sided this conversation. She talked - I listened. Two completely different worlds. If we managed to find something in common, something we could share with each other, then by sharing, we again felt that we had a connection.

If a person falls into the water from the pier and calls for help, nobody comes to mind to pass by with the words: "He only did it to get attention to yourself."

Also disgusting was in University, when I enrolled in psychology, got into an environment where instead of curiosity and this quest for knowledge was dominated by the desperate struggle of all against all. Here the only important thing was to get into the ranks of the lucky ones who have received marks that will allow you to get through the eye of a needle one of the few who take to study of a promising specialty. The joy of acquiring knowledge is here replaced by the pursuit of marks, so that proper process has remained dry, gnawed bones. I have long realized this and have felt the effects, I didn't like it, but I have not seen with such clarity how it was disgusting. <...> And then I thought: okay, it's very ugly, but I will do all that is required in order to achieve its goal, and, whenever possible, try to maintain the dignity and good humor, and then when I take the chosen specialty, I will try to regain partially lost joyful attitude to acquiring new knowledge.

I felt some awfully empty, distant and gray, and dead.

Sister asked how well I eat, and I had everything in order. She asked if I am afraid of getting fat and not afraid to ride the bus, but such fears I suffered. I was afraid of other thoughts: if I really belong to me my thoughts and she asked me. I told her that everything seems gray and I don't want to live. Then she sent me to the school psychologist.