Character: Sanya Balabin

There are things more important than "important" calls.

- I am the winner of the "Best Ham of the Year" contest!

- You are also unpleasant to me, mister businessman ...

Semyonovna, well, don't worry like that, but ... They told you - it's okay. Get out of me, you know, how many bullets have been picked up for the entire service - you can cast a dumbbell. Nothing, I walk, I don’t even cough.

Ay! It hurts, huh! ... The main purpose of the little toe on the foot is to make sure that all the furniture is in place.

Nicholson, I’m in such an incomprehensible mood right now ... Either I want flowers and music, or I want to kill someone ...

Listen, Nicholson, when do we have a day of provocateurs? January ninth? Well, there, pop Gapon, all that ...

If the top three buttons are not fastened on the blouse, then the eyes and lips can not be painted.

How! They twisted the little hands, and so that it would not be so painful and insulting, they spat on the back ...

Well, my friend, they will put you on a chain now. And through a syringe, in the place where the back bifurcates, you will be injected with kindness to people for many years. So you'll get used to sitting.

- Mood to hell ... I'll go shoot someone.

- Toilet paper left. It chews well and takes a long time to digest.

Nicolson, know what people are different from birds?
- No. What?
When they piss on each other on the head, this is not a good sign.

Any woman I like, you would probably have to go to a psychologist.