Character: Scott Pilgrim. Page 1

- You're in a rock band?
- Yes, we're terrible. Come, eh?
- You have a band?
- Yeah, we're terrible. Please come.

- Why are you standing here?
- I'm actually waiting for you.
- Oh, sorry, I thought you were too cool to be on time.

- To be smart?
- Of course I will.
Seriously, be smart.
- And that is usually all bad?

- And you with it did it?
We did a lot of things: we took the bus, had long conversations what to wear to prom, her friends and all sorts of dramas.
- Well, at least you kissed?
- Once held hands, but she was shy.
- Why are you smiling then?
- I don't understand what you mean.

- She's going to prifigel?
- She'll just sit in the corner.
- I want her away from us provigil.
- Will prifigel, she does that, there is a tendency such.
- Is she gonna geek out on us?
- She'll just sit in the corner, man.
- I mean, I want her to geek out on us.
- She'll geek. She geeks. She has the capacity to geek.

- You don't remember me, do you? We met at the party the other day.
- Were you the Pac-Man guy?
- No. Not even. That was some total ass. I was the other guy.
- You don't remember me, we met at a party at Julia.
- You drove about PAC-man?
- No, not me. It was some fool... I'm another fool.

You know what sucks?
What?
- Everything.
- You know what really sucks?
- What?
- Everything...

I don't fight girls, they're... soft.
I don't think I can hit a girl. They're... soft.

- If she's your dream girl, tell her. Say the word with the letter "L".
A lesbian?
- No, another word on "L".
- Lesbians?
- If you want something bad, you have to fight for it. Step up your game, Scott. Break out the L-word.
- Lesbian?
- The other L-word.
- Lesbians?

- Wallis. What's the address Amazon.com?
- Amazon.com...
- Need to order a che-thread is very cool.
Computer: You've got mail
- He said me a letter.
- Yeah, how came the progress...
And so I read it.
Mm, I'm happy for you...
"Dear Mr. pilgrim, I hasten to inform You that soon we'll fight. My name is Matthew Limpets... and blah blah blah... I Warn you, one on one... the Seven evil... blah blah blah..." it's... It's...
What?!
- It's spam.