Character: Willie Tanner

“I bet you can't say it six times faster.

As I have told you many times, we will perfectly cope with childbirth, without turning it, as you like to do it, into an emergency. I understand that this is a very long sentence, I hope I put it quite accurately.

- He can't take a hint.
I wonder if he will understand a kick in the ass?

Willy, it was an accident!
- Coincidence?! Yes, you almost killed me saying that it was an accident?!
- Well, call it a mistake...

On Melmak I was known as Master of Science.
- Yeah? From what master of science is not able to repair your spaceship?
Because the MSC does not know how to handle tools. So I was expelled from dental school.
- You went to dental school?
Yes. I thought that it was the most simple craft. We have only 4 teeth.

Ralph, where did you get that zipper?
Willy, do you remember your old coat that you want to throw - don't throw it out... I cut off the zip with your new coat.

- Can't move, Willie!
Why?
Because I lose!

- This is a jigsaw puzzle.
- It's broken!
- That's the object, ALF. You're supposed to put it together.
- Why? I didn't break it!
Is a toy - puzzle.
- She is broken!
In this sense, Alf. You have to collect it.
- What is it? I didn't break it!

- The night before Christmas! I already hid all the eggs!
But we hide eggs on Easter...
Oh, yeah, Christmas is when we carve pumpkins!

- Alf, I'm trying to explain to you that ways to remove the cat's skin more than one.
- Oh, you read my cooking notes...

- Be careful. Game Cyrano can not bring any good.
- Cyrano is as poker?

- Don't you understand?
- Do not get it?
- The essence of life together. We make laws and execute them in order to make our lives turned into chaos. If someone violates these laws, you or I, who is still, then life becomes impossible.
- Your truth. I don't get it.

- Tell me, tell me again... Why are you flooded living room?
- Wanted to make a skating rink.
How are you going to freeze?
- Would include the conditioning...
- Tell me one more time..! Again!
- It's not a Bergman film... everything is simple and obvious - water, air, holiday on ice.

Willy, I know the rule "We don't eat members of our family..."
- We don't eat members of one's family!
- And whom do we eat?