Book: Adolescence

Another time, remembering suddenly that death awaits me every hour, every minute, I decided, not realizing they do not realized that until now, the people that a person can only be so happy as using this and not thinking about the future, and I for three days, under the influence of this thought, he dropped the lessons and was doing just that, lying on the bed, enjoying the reading of a novel and eating gingerbread with krakowskim honey, which I bought on the last money.

I was bashful by nature, but shyness has increased my conviction of my ugliness. And I am sure that nothing has such a dramatic impact on the direction of a person as his appearance, and not so much the appearance, as the belief in the attractiveness or unattractiveness of it.

Miserable, miserable spring of moral activity is the human mind!

And his smile was such that you unconsciously noticed it and was grateful to him for that smile.

It's a real feeling of hatred...not of the hatred, which only romance novels and which I don't believe the hate that finds delight in doing evil to man, not the hatred which inspires you with an irresistible aversion to the man, however, deserves your respect, makes you nasty his hair, neck, walk, sound of voice, movements, and yet know not what incomprehensible force attracts you towards him and with restless attention makes to watch for any of his actions.

In his youth, all the powers of the soul aims for the future, and the future of this takes in such diverse, vibrant and enchanting forms under the influence of hope, based not on the experience of the past, and the imagined possibility of happiness, that some witnesses are divided and dreams of a future happiness be true happiness in this age.

Between the countless number of thoughts and dreams, without any track passing in the mind and imagination, there are those that leave them sensitive deep furrow; so often, not knowing is the essence of thought, remember that there was something good in the head, feel a trace of thoughts and try again to reproduce it.

There are moments when the future appears to a person in such a gloomy light as he's afraid to stop their mental eyes, a completely stops the activities of the mind and trying to convince myself that the future will not be the last was not. At such moments, when thought is not forward of each determination of the will, and the only springs of life remain carnal instincts, I understand that the child, in neopytnoj, are particularly prone to this state, without the slightest hesitation and fear, with a smile of curiosity, lays out, and contemplating the fire under their own house in which his sleeping brothers, a father, a mother whom he dearly loves. Under the influence of this temporary absence of thought - the scattering post - peasant boy of seventeen, examining the blade just sharpened ax beside the bench on which a person sleeps his aged father, suddenly swings the axe and blunt curiosity looks like under the bench oozing blood from the hacked neck; under the influence of the same lack of thought and instinctive curiosity the man finds some delight to stay at the edge of the cliff and think: what if shake trigger? or to look at some very important person for all of society chuvstvuet podorozhanie respect, and think: and what, if to approach him, grab his nose and say: "come, my dear, shall we go?"

The vanity has a sense of the incongruous with true sorrow, and yet the feeling is so firmly grafted into human nature, which is very rare even the most powerful grief banishes him. Vanity in sorrow expresses a desire to seem or frustrated, or miserable, or solid; and these low desires, we do not admit, but which are almost never even in the strongest of sorrow do not leave us, depriving her of strength, dignity and sincerity.

At the same time to love and to love means to love twice as strong than before.

Did you happen, to a certain time of life, you suddenly notice that your view of things completely changed, as if all the items that you have seen until then, suddenly turned to another, as yet unknown party?

How many unsaid desires, thoughts and fear, life is clear - expressed in one casual glance when timidly and hesitantly meet your eyes.