TV series: 2.5 / Two and a half men (Two and a Half Men). Page 8

Listen to me, old man... No matter how old you are, it's how you feel. For example, I feel like a piece of boiled shit.

- As my mother used to say: "a well-Fed man is a happy man."
And our mother said, "Nate$ 10 for a pizza lunch don't wait".

- You look just like my fifth husband.
- Yes?! And how many times have you been married?
Four.

Once I convinced him that the clothes dryer is a time machine; when he got out of it, I was dressed as a monk and threatened to burn him as a sorcerer.

- Alan, buddy, I'm a little starting to strain that you drink.
- I have no problem with that.
- And I have. You whipped my best stocks!

- How are you feeling, Danny?
- I didn't get much sleep tonight, Alan. I had nightmares... I dreamt I ate a five-pound candy...
- A five-pound candy?
- Yes! And when I woke up, my pillow was gone!

I tried to forget you, to hate you, but I couldn't.
- Most such problems do not happen.

You're here. You're gay. I do not mind.