Character: Wick Prutkovskaya

- ... In short, we were 15 and we were complete fools.
- And th is was?.. That is why the fools?

What a beautiful day! What a wonderful weather!
- Ohh... where are You so happy?
- From the hospital. I had surgery and the anesthesia hasn't worn off. When it's over, I again say that life sucks.

- So, what can be useful?
- The fact that my mother's obsession to marry me off.
- The fact that my daughter has a thing: she thinks I have a thing.
- The fact that they brought me here, and how to return home, I can't remember.

- Jeanne, Jeanne Izhevsk. Izhevsk. Through "F".
- Zhanna Arkadyevna always all through "X"...

Ksunechka may marmelades?
Water, and better poison.

- You know, Lenka Kurosawa invited to the next party.
- Bloody hell! So I have to pack!
- Not-e-et! She only invited me.
- What about me?
- And about you hinted that you do not.
- How is it hinted?
- Oh, you know, subtle. He said, "And this redneck with a do not bring".

- Mom, I'm getting married. He was a Frenchman.
- I thought you would encourage domestic producers.

Ksenia, if you're going to eat so much of sweet, you have all his teeth fall out!
- Well and let! It is a law of nature! Children under seven years old should eat more sweets to have baby teeth fall out and grown new and beautiful!

- What is it? A letter... Wonder who?
Prime Minister!
- Why did you tell him by e-mail will not send?
- The Kremlin should know my handwriting. And then I e-mail send 200 rubles?..
- The following adress, Prime Minister, we certainly need help, but I think that 200 rubles is not going to save the country's budget.
- What is the budget? Am I crazy? It's all on the payment of foreign debt!
- Then take another and here it is [holds out coins]. On the development of Russian sports!
Denis, if you're so smart, take it and help the Ksyushka!
- Oh, no! You want to make the same as Santa Claus? All my life I wrote letters to him, and suddenly it turns out that it does not exist.

- Don't be nervous. It is better to drink wine, that's comforting!
- I - no! Me - on the contrary!
- Well, what are you comforting your nerves?
Hair.
- You're tearing their hair out?
Not on myself... Doing other hairstyles. The effect is the same.

- Vika, what are you doing with the French collector's wine?
- Mulled wine! Still have a couple of bottles of Moldovan there, cinnamon, pepper... to get all!
- Vika, to make French wines mulled wine - it's like making Pavarotti sing songs of "Tender may".

- When I was on the Champs Elysees...
Is when you were there?
- In College when I was. We at the collective farm have sent, to Eliseeva.

- Actually, I wanted to have a drink for me and Vic, because soon we're going on a honeymoon.
- Steve, Steve, wait a minute... What honeymoon? I haven't said "Yes".
- Ah! Soon Vick will say Yes, and we're going on a honeymoon!

- Comrade General...
Why, comrade General!
- Can I ask?..
- What are we, in the army, or what? Contact just: "let's go"!