Author of quotes: Yuri Vladimirovich Nikulin

Every thousand years the God descends to earth and invites the three rulers of the leading countries. And he answers one question. And here before him, Thatcher, Reagan and Gorbachev. Reagan asks: "how many years in the United States will have the same life as you do in heaven?" God took out his notebook, looked up and said, "after 27 years". Reagan was upset: "I will not live..." Second Thatcher: "when we live in Paradise?" God said, "35 years later". Thatcher let the tears: "Sorry, I can't see..." the Third was our Mikhail Gorbachev: "Well, in Russia when the Paradise will be? "God cried, "I will not live...".

In the early days of the war in our territory abandoned by the Germans, disguised as police officers, the Soviet military railroad. Many of them were caught. Was said to have occurred and such a case. The German, dressed in Soviet military uniforms, was Sestroretsk. At him suddenly from the corner came a Soviet General. The Germans were confused and instead to give greetings to the salute, threw a hand forward, as did the Nazis. He was immediately arrested.

Happiness is very simple. I get up in the morning. My wife and I drink coffee. Eat Breakfast. And I'm going to work in the circus. Then I work in the circus. Go back in the evening. My wife and I are having dinner. Drink tea. I'm going to bed.

What fate is? When along a single track toward moving two trains. Rushing, flying with great speed at night, not suspecting that a possible accident. And yet they do not collide. Why? And, apparently, not fate!

Comedy is serious business!

Much good can be done if you have a good mood.

Never avenge the meanest people. Just get happy. And they will not survive...

If each of us will be able to make happy another person, at least one on earth will all be happy.

And we guys will be our victory. The main thing that they were not in arms.

I have a half played, now extra time.

For me, I'm still unclear.

I was blown away, and therefore silent. It is already called and volunteered my services.