Character: Felix Unger

- I want to say that they would prefer to live with someone like Teddy, instead of me?
- Well, you chose not to.
Is there?
- Felix, you just showed up and stayed.

- Well, well, look who came back after trying to drown problems in alcohol.
- I know the answer: we.
But they do not drown, because the problems know how to swim.
- Freeze them in a block of ice.
And hear the ice in viscaria!

- I don't know what I was thinking. I am such a fool!
No, you just wanted to end the pain. If it was possible, but it will not work. You had your heart broken and it will take time.

- I've never seen Oscar so emotional.
- What, a man can't Express his feelings? We have hearts, broken or not!

- I thought you were avoiding the "Langfords"?
Why? Because Emily works there and she dumped me? Yeah, I didn't really see Emily after the break up, and I avoided the "Langfords", I also walked the stairs instead of the Elevator and put on a mustache and takes to pass through the lobby.
- That was you?! Damn, and I thought johnny Depp was seen...

- Take me, coach, I will not fail!
- Do you even have a MITT?
- ... I have a potholder.

I had a bad dream or did you say that he was born hairy?
- It's called "lanugo". For Halloween, my mom dressed as Dorothy and carried me around in a wicker basket.

- My neck hurts. Serves me right for what I was trying to prove that I am one of you.
What are you talking about?
- I see you communicate with friends. I would like to be part of this. As you are friends, busting my balls...
- Chase the balls! And even if you're not, you got your own jokes. You cook, do the crossword puzzle in ink, you play a great guitar...
- Cello!
- Cello. If I could, I think I would have tried to impress guys in a silly softball?
- Oscar, you admire me?
- I'm glad you're not afraid to be an intelligent oddball. No offense. I'm just kidding.

- My neck hurts. Serves me right for what I was trying to prove that I am one of you.
What are you talking about?
- I see you communicate with friends. I would like to be part of this. As you are friends, busting my balls...
- Chase the balls! And even if you're not, you got your own jokes. You cook, do the crossword puzzle in ink, you play a great guitar...
- Cello!
- Cello. If I could, I think I would have tried to impress guys in a silly softball?
- Oscar, you admire me?
- I'm glad you're not afraid to be an intelligent oddball. No offense. I'm just kidding.

Go ahead.
- Yes, let's do it in Greek.
- I'm asking you to go ahead when they say such things.

We both pick five sports. Classic decathlon.
- I agree.
- Agreed. Decathlon at dawn!
- At dawn?
- Yes, you're right. Decathlon at a reasonable time!

I already beat you at two sports, but if you're bashing, Yes, there is such a word, I'm happy.
- I suspect you will choose the things for something like knitting.
- You mean cricket?
- No, definitely not.
- Guess who's not getting mittens for Christmas? I hope your arrogance will keep you warm.

I thought the point was in communion and unity, but it turned out that you just want to beat me, to feel superior. So you know, sir, you've woken the dragon! And you would know what that means, if you should see me at least one episode of "Game of thrones".
I don't need to watch the show to know that awakening of the dragon - bad!

- I'm sorry, but the numbness came from the joint and pace, so 36 hours gets to the heart.
- Ironically, despite all your calculations, you'll die, falling from this balcony.
- You may not care, but Dr. McManus took an oath and I am sure she won't mind a quick inspection.
- Felix, I think you're overreacting and I don't have my tools.
- I have my own.