Character: Stuart Bloom

- Sheldon, I'm afraid you are greatly mistaken.
- Much mistaken?! Error is the absolute condition, it tolerates no gradations.
- Well why, to call a tomato a vegetable is a small error. Big is to say it's a suspension bridge.

- Listen, the time is still very childish, can you come over for coffee?
I don't know, kind of late for coffee, isn't it?
- You really thought that "coffee" means coffee? It's so cute! All right, I think it is decaf.
Stewart, I mean really heard your voice, you got a minute?
- Sheldon, we're a little busy here.
- What are you doing?
- We'll drink coffee.
- A little late for coffee?
- Yes, no problem, it has no caffeine.
- I'll go until it will look... <...> I found the decaf!
- Oh, great.
And I herbal tea, please.

Is that me?
Depends on whether you like it or not.
Well, it is very beautiful.
- Yes, that's you.
What if I said I didn't like it?
- Well, it would still be you, only I'd feel like an idiot.
- I can't believe Stewart rolls up to the penny.
- It is necessary urgently to learn to draw!

- Well, who tomorrow will be to paint the nursery?
- I'll paint.
- Why are you? I am an artist by education.
- The fact that you're always hungry, doesn't make you an artist.

I'll just... I'll get some more.
- Since you're gone... don't come.

- And I like that you never swear!
And because people can offend, not even using expletives!

Oh, and how many dates have you had?
Two. Needless to say that this is as much as two more than zero.

- Have you thought about advertising aimed at women?
- Well, like this: put a sign in the window says "Women, not stupid! Not afraid, go!"
- Listen, did you even read the responses about their school?
- Yes, but on the Internet everyone is angry, I try not go there.
- Well, Heather Ha writes: "the Owner stared at me and all the time never even blinked"... But Kelly Um writes: "This bugger, the owner of the shop asked me to go on a date with him, and then he called himself a dick, even before I turned him down"... Jessica Ka: "I told this guy to the owner that I liked his shirt, so he took it off and gave it to me"...
- I see... you are evil... everything.

Will you stop staring?! Girls, what is not seen?! They are exactly the same as in the movies or in pictures.

- Do you like raisins in chocolate?
- I said to him calmly.
- In the movie, Wolowitz always eats raisinets.
And you will be more comfortable if I ate raisinets?
- What you eat is none of my business. The main thing that it is not crunched during the movie and it was a chocolate-covered raisins.

- What's wrong with this guy?
- Everyone has their own theory on this...