fantasy [Theme]

Even handing over your own partner to another man, which is the most excruciating and painful experience imaginable, is much more bearable than not being able to separate from her.

The magnitude of the grandiosity of the narcissistic self-idealization depends on his possession of the partner. This is called co-idealization. When a narcissist idealizes his partner, he thereby idealizes himself in that he owns his partner. It is as if he said: “I own this ideal object, which means that I myself am ideal.”

Often the narcissist himself chooses a man who will be an excellent candidate for cheating on his wife or girlfriend. These are all parts of a theatrical play or film. It's all about the narcissistic fantasy of betrayal. The narcissist needs to be betrayed. Because during the betrayal, the narcissist experiences such pain that it will facilitate his separation. And it will not only facilitate, but also make separation irreversible.

These are permeable dissociative partitions. This is a fascinating concept because it explains many things that we couldn't explain until now.

A psychotic person confuses internal objects with external ones because he does not have the constellation "I". It's the same with a narcissist. He confuses external objects with internal ones because he has no self. Therefore, when you have a clearly constructed “I”, which is built on the foundation of continuous memories, dissociation goes away, the shell of fantasy collapses.

A shared fantasy is sort of like Disneyland. But why is she capable of producing a reaction of prolonged grief? The reason is that shared fantasy is actually similar to trance or pseudo-hypnosis.

How does a narcissist create addiction in an intimate partner? He idealizes it and then allows the intimate partner to form an emotional attachment to the idealized image of himself. So it's just a form of self-love. Therefore, when an intimate partner falls in love with a narcissist, he does not fall in love with the narcissist, because the narcissist is unknowable. A narcissist is simply a quantity of something that one cannot fall in love with. The intimate partner falls in love with the image idealized by the narcissist. The narcissist gives access to an idealized image and then allows one to be in contact with his idealization and this is excellent. You just fall in love with yourself.

When you are in fantasy, you are God.

Addiction is a fantasy.

Fantasy protection is protection from bad things.

Don't trust writers, they are great dreamers. And happy people, in fact, because the creator immediately wrote out an indulgence for them to make up an invention: they say, lie, so be it, you can.

He was too tired to think, and was already beginning to feel disgusted with himself, as if he had done something shameful and irreparable. Everything elevated in him was suppressed, his ambition was dulled, and his vitality weakened so much that he no longer felt any aspirations. He was dead. His soul was dead. He became just a beast, a working beast. He no longer noticed any beauty in the sunshine that pierced the green foliage, and the depth of the heavenly azure no longer excited him and did not evoke thoughts of the cosmos, full of mysterious mysteries that he so wanted to solve. Life was dull and meaningless, and it left a bad taste in my mouth. A black blanket was thrown over the screen of his imagination, and his fantasy languished, driven into a dark closet, into which not a single ray of light penetrated.

Throughout our lives we create a certain image of ourselves in our minds. But this fantasy is worth absolutely nothing. The real you is determined by the circumstances in which you find yourself. And don't have any illusions.